Breaking Through at 4
At little over 4 years old, I remember playing outside and coming inside to my grandma. She told me mom and dad went to the movie. Her warmth and love in her hug were reassuring and more than enough to have me quickly falling asleep.
Not knowing how much later, I found myself waking up on the couch. My eyes were still adjusting to soft darkness in the room when I realized grandma wasn’t there.
Jumping down from the couch, I called her – no answer; checked her room – she wasn’t there, another room – nobody there either. The main door to check if she is on terrace – locked.
Oooo, I was never locked before and I was never alone before!
Even though the first time, I was sure it was not meant to last.
Running and jumping back on the couch my eyes and nose laid up on the window to see in the backyard. Nobody there. Same soft darkness getting darker.
Turning my head from the window, I vividly remember naturally, without any resistance, going straight to the stove, opening the coal drawer, picking a good one and carrying it back on the couch.
Standing up close and determined, my hand sharply in one motion sent the coal through the lower part of the window. It made one beautiful hole.
Without any hesitation, any fear, or any thought, in “no time” I was dragging myself through that narrow hole – legs first.
Short few moments later my feet met the concrete on the backyard ground; my rear following promptly.
Landing wasn’t soft yet it was worth it – I was on the other side of the locked door and I knew where to go.
Few houses down the street were my grandma sister’s house. I happily and somewhat proudly went there to look for grandma. Needless to say, they were shocked seeing me come.
How did I get out, why didn’t I wait, and what will dad say for the broken window and the fact that what I did could hurt me. …Way too many questions.
All of it was not my problem. I found my problem in being locked and alone. At the same time, the solution found me and it was executed with a faith only a child can have.
From my parents to whole neighborhood, I heard nobody knew how I exited through such small hole without even a scratch, God forbid anything worse.
To this day I myself don’t know the answer either, yet for sure I know the strength, determination, and faith that got me thru the window hole that evening. I know the same hand got me through many similar holes later in life.
Fear did not forever leave me that night either, it showed up numerous times later and still does. What’s interesting is – there is always some kind of coal nad some kind of window to get through.